Are you really happy ?

With all the environmental issues that our world is currently facing, it is easy to forget about the everlasting dilemma that lays within all of us - the manipulation of social media on our lives. At this present time, there is an urgent need of tackling it as it is, starting to be more powerful than ever and with it, the likelihood of losing the fundamental meaning of the true happiness that each one of us has as well.

According to Statista, there are 40 million social network users in the UK now, with the number being forecast to rise up to 42 in three years’ time. Nowadays the internet can be accessed from any device, especially from a phone as it's the easiest and fastest route. As an infographic done by Wearesocial- an agency approach website that provides data on social behaviour for brands and business problems illustrates, almost a quarter of users, out of the total population access the internet via mobile, with 58% of them being active on social media. Facebook and Instagram are still the main leading platforms where people are most active on, with 40 million respectively 24 million accessing it every month, followed by Twitter, Snapchat and LinkedIn. On all of these platforms, young adults are in demand, which conceives the risk of them being the most influenced by it.

With so much bombardment from social media on the current generation and it being immensely used by the young audience , it only stresses a simple question: How can we fight the urge of getting ‘'brainwashed'' into believing this fake portrayal of happiness that it displays to us and persist into pursuing our own ?

Abigail Baker, a psychodynamic counsellor - who uses therapy to help people look at both their past and present experiences in order to get a better understanding around the reasons for the problems or patterns they might experience throughout their life, has a different answer to the cause of this. As a therapist who focuses more on getting the unconscious patterns out, because they could be the key cause of most of people’s present choices and emotions, she had first-hand knowledge on how easy an individual can be influenced into believing the display of what happiness seems to mean, as portrayed by social media.

In her perspective, it’s all based on the deep-rooted feelings that unconsciously affect how much we trust social media and what it displays. If you have a stable upbringing that nurtured you into having a robust and resilient personality , you are less likely to get drowned into believing what happiness is conceived of, as shown by Instagram or Facebook, but if not then ''it will start eating and eating''. Social media is not just a platform anymore now. It's become a force that ‘'eats our own happiness'' says Abigail.

‘'When we think about happiness you cannot be in a state of happiness all the time. To be human is to have moments of happiness, moments of joy but otherwise, life is full of all different types of emotions and some are difficult and some are messy but I think there is something about that portrayal on social media that starts to erode that true feeling of us being human''.

Similarly, as Martin Common, a holistic practitioner at Tai Chi Qigong for Health Bournemouth states, balance is important too. After practicing the Chinese integrated mind-body healing method, promoting internal peace and happiness for almost four years, he believes being in balance and feeling comfortable in our own skin is the key to win this assiduous battle.

‘'When we feel whole as a person then we're much less likely to believe that something would make us happy because we would be happy already. You become present to the moment, notice what's going on around you but not believing it. Clarity is also there – in the present moment and in that place social media is not going to appear that interesting.''

Tracey Beesley, lifestyle consultant, professional declutterer and blogger of ''The lifestyle concept'' supports this idea: ‘'I think it's all about getting that right balance and not believing everything but taking from it what you want and what you need.'' As the blogger adds, happiness is not to chase but to be lived in the moment. From a decluttering perspective, a social platform like Instagram can seem calm and organised which is what draws people to it but is more than that.

‘'We're leaving with tinges of sadness and when I talk about decluttering, I talk about both physical and mentally decluttering and letting go. Decluttering of the mind is the most important process''.

Happiness can have various meanings , depending on how each one of us defines it. To some it is a on-going search , to others is the already-found feeling that you want cling to, for the rest of your life.

It is important to find your happiness , but more important is to know how to keep it.